A wise son makes a glad father, but a foolish son is a sorrow to his mother. (Proverbs 10:1)
This brief proverb follows the standard form. In it, a wise and foolish son are contrasted. The wise son produces joy in his father, while the foolish son grieves his mother. The point is not that moms and dads react differently to folly or wisdom. The point is that parents—fathers or mothers—are blessed when their kids make wise decisions and are pained when they make foolish ones.
Know You Need To Learn
This little proverb has much to say about how to be wise. First, it suggests that wise people know that they have much to learn. A child lacking all the experience and perspective of their parents, who turns to their parents for guidance, knows they need to learn.
When my children were little, they would sometimes say, "I know" about things they could not possibly know. We must avoid this tendency and accept that we have much to learn. Because God is a speaking God who wants us to listen to his heart, the Bible is full of guidance and instruction for us.
Be a person who knows you need to learn. Let a hunger for wisdom fan into full flame within you. Have an insatiable desire. If you can gain this longing, this perspective, you will figure out how to read good books, listen to good sermons, and study Scripture. Your hunger pains will serve you.
Learn From the Right Sources
Second, this proverb suggests that wise people learn from the right sources. This is implied, but the wise son in this proverb heeds the wisdom of his mother and father. He keeps turning to the right sources for wisdom—the wise people who have gone before him.
Tod Bolsinger wrote, "We don't learn from experience, we learn by reflecting on experience."[^1] And experience doesn't always have to be ours; we can learn from the experience of others. A wise son looks to a wise father and mother for guidance, reflecting on the lessons they have already learned, sometimes through trial and error.
Be a person who learns from the right sources. Ours is a day filled with false prophets and the musings of misguided fools. Be careful who you listen to and who you follow. Look to the godly. Look to the wise. Look to past generations. Look to the word.
Be Motivated by Love
Lastly, this proverb suggests that wise people are motivated by love. Because they can see how a life of wisdom brings joy to their parents while folly saddens them, the wise son is motivated by love for his parents. Private folly leads to public harm, and private wisdom leads to widespread blessing. Wise people can connect the dots—their wisdom helps others, while individual folly hurts others.
Be a person who is motivated to be as wise as you can because of love. If you love Christ, you will respond with obedience to Christ. If you love your church, you will seek to bless it with your life. If you love your family, you will keep your nose clean through wise living. Folly can destroy marriages, devour families, and sink churches. So love demands we hate folly.
Up to this point, I have not mentioned that this is the first proverb in a new section of "the proverbs of Solomon" (Prov. 10:1). Over 80% of Proverbs was written by Solomon, the son and successor to King David. Solomon is the king who God invited to ask for his heart's desire—make a wish, Solomon! And Solomon requested wisdom.
So it is interesting that this divinely inspired man of wisdom began this new cluster of proverbs by fleshing out what a wise son looks like. We are all sons or daughters—no exceptions—and we all have a choice to make. Will we pursue wisdom, or will we embrace folly? Will we humbly acknowledge our need to learn, or will our pride get the best of us? Will we turn to the right sources to teach us, or will we listen to the endless parade of fools on our touchscreens? And will we recognize the impact of our lives on others, choosing to love them by living wisely?
[^1]: Bolsinger, Tod. 2015. Canoeing the Mountains: Christian Leadership in Uncharted Territory. Downers Grove, IL: Inter-Varsity Press.
